All grown up and nowhere to go

go take taxi ah

Posted on: April 20, 2009

The most dangerous vehicles on the roads of Singapore are by far Angsty Cabs. These cabs do the ziggy-wiggy across the lanes better than Will Smith ever jigged wit’ it. They swerve, they honk, and they leave vision-impairing cloud of dust behind as they zoom devil-may-caredly by.

But what’s more dangerous than having Angsty Cabs in your vicinity is to be in an Angsty Cab. They do get you to your destination at the fastest time possible, but there’s no guarantee you’ll arrive there in one piece. For eg., I had the unfortunate luck to have flagged down an Angsty Cab with a mad bat of a driver. He sped down across TWO lanes, too polite to signal ‘left’ and not wanting to trouble other cars to slow down.

Unfortunately, there’s something even more dangerous than being in an Angsty Cab. It is to be in an Angsty Cab which was attempting to change lane almost perpendicularly only to encounter another Angsty Cab refusing to budge from its current speed and lane.

My madbat driver horned long and hard for a very scary five seconds in which the two Angsty Cabs seemed to almost magnetically come together. He kept horning in the hopes that, by the force of the sound, sooner than later the other cab would drift away like a butterfly in the face of a windstorm.

At the end of it, we have my heart up my throat and a very pissed off driver swearing in Hokkien after he swerved at the last minute to avoid collision. The two cabbies played a game of chicken and guess who lost.

FRIENDLY SUGGESTION TO THE SINGAPORE GOVERNMENT:

Please label your city-state’s cabs with Angsty-ness Degrees, options as below –

A. Nice Chatty Uncle Inside (but will drive you the long way)
B. Keep Quiet Uncle Inside
C. Super Angsty, My-Dick-Just-Kana-Kiaped-In-The-Door  Uncle Inside

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1 Response to "go take taxi ah"

“my dick just kena kiaped in the door” hahahaha

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