All grown up and nowhere to go

Archive for February 2010

Just got home from Players… V tired. Ended 5th, but damn so much hard work just to break even. Inspired to write a poem… I shall finish writing it by 5.00 am.

The quiet of the morning makes me think
How everything has an end
Even the sky needs to touch the ground, somehow
You can’t fight this limit

And we only want things that we lack
So henceforth thus, do you realize
The yearning may be worth having more
Than the thing itself?

Also. In this dark you fear for ghosts and ghouls.
But fear them not, feel their envy
It’s really all you, scaring yourself silly
You imagine, you dream, you breathe, they can’t

4.52, 8 minutes til I wrap this up
Time stands still at dawn really
You can be anything, think anything these remaining minutes
But come 5 am, touch the end of the sky and wait for the sun.


Good news! This second day of Lunar New Year the weird oil gland lump in my right eyelid has receded. Although not completely healed yet, I’m hopeful that the eyelid would return to normal by close of the week.

However, other matters have cropped up which are making me go ‘Umm… shit’ on a regular basis, like those Shaolin monks with their Amitabha’s.

1. Humongous credit card bill. While exacerbated by
– London ticket
– Over $600 spent to fix the goddamn eyelid infection
– Miu Miu purse
– Hong Kong ticket,
it is still crazy a lot of money without the above incurrences.

2. In relation to the above, rejected medical claim for the goddamn eye specialist. Like, what’s the deal, <insert company name here>? Have you not sucked enough of my blood, sweat, tears, love life (lack of), and weekday nights? Just fuckin’ approve the fuckin’ claim, yah? Fuckin’ <insert company name here>. It’s not that I’d give up the ghost so easily and pay for the medical stuff on my own, but just the thought of having to call the insurance company and arguing with them is a pain in the arse. Also need to go back to GP and get a copy of the fuckin’ referral letter which the fuckin’ eye specialist took. Shitfuckall.

3. ASOS shipment isn’t here yet. I spent $360 on that (okay less ‘cos my colleague rode on my order as well, but still, since it shows on my credit card bill I feel the pain more). It has been more than the 10-11 business days slated delivery time, and they kept saying the order is untrackable.

4. UO shipment is held by Borderlinx. Why? Why? Why???

5. Weight gain, but this is nothing new.

6. I really want to buy stuff from Forever21 but how can I when my credit card bill is like Hades trying to consume me into the underworld???

This year, I’m doing CNY prep in style, and here’s how you can do it too!

Friday 12 Feb 2010

1. Go for minor eye surgery to remove oil gland lump from eyelid
2. In the evening, go for an arthouse movie with eye still swollen despite doctor’s forecast that all will be well in a few hours
3. Meet friends @ Donna Carmela at Greenwood for some yummy pasta and parma ham, and attempt to cajole friend who was just offered a good job to pay for meal but to no avail
4. Agree to go to ROM at 6 am the next morning so friend and I can apply for an HDB
5. Dinner over, friendships now turn to war for money in the poker table at the MTP compounds
6. Argue about the Louboutins-for-sex theory while throwing chips around and feeling cards. Discovered poker players are largely sensitive new age guys.
7. Apply antibiotic eye cream to eye in the toilet while friends continue to donate money to one another.
8. At 2 am, discuss the philosophical question “Would you rather meet the love of your life but stay poor forever, or receive $10 million?”
9. Amount jacked up to $1 billion to entice.
10. Discovered poker players are largely idealists who try to find loopholes in the philosophical question.
11. Driven home by friend, singing Close to You

Saturday 13 Feb 2010F (that is F for forecast, means I have yet to do the things listed below but most likely intend to. Although if economic forecasts are anything to go by it’s probably a hit-and-miss)

1. Properly wake up and play with remaining lump on eyelid
2. Finish this blog entry feeling like a comedic genius
3. Find out what time the 4-episode back-to-back Glee will show on Star World
4. Wash up and eat breakfast/lunch while playing with remaining lump on eyelid
5. SPRING CLEAN ROOM v. important!
6. REALLY spring clean room, instead of just folding one piece of clothing and putting it into the cupboard!
7. Thoroughly ponder whether or not to ship the UO stuff now, or shop some more and combine the shipping to Singapore
8. Play with remaining lump on eyelid, contemplate terrorizing doctor on why it hasn’t all gone away yet
9. Reunion dinner!!! Steamboat!
10. Check the weighing scale to ensure it is not faulty

Coo…! Can’t wait for these babies to get here 🙂

Shopglee is the best feeling (until your credit card bill comes).

Gonna go for Broadway Jazz tomorrow so have to dig out old dance shoes (Zee, imma trying the class with Syd tomorrow, I’ll let you know if it’s any good).

Before digging out dance shoes I’m allowing myself a half hour Procrastination Break, ‘cuz everybody knows how much of a pain in the arse digging things out is.

So newsflash during Procrastination Break:
1. Resorts World Sentosa, aka RWS, aka one of gambling god’s two gifts to men, will open its casino doors on 13 Feb. I can hear the sound of chips falling and knocking into each other already!

2. I got nothin.

Oh yes. Sex. What can I say about sex… (I wrote the title of the post first, and thought “mmm what word would go with ‘gambling’ “?)

Sex is overrated, at least for women. It’s the epitome of instant gratification (3 seconds), after which there’d be an anti-climax (hur hur pun). Really, what’s in it for women, who crave long-term affection, comfort and care? On the other hand, men are creatures of lust and convenience. Instant gratification was created for them.

So I think men should compensate women for sacrificing their own need for being cared for. I think, as part of ANY courtship – be it a 50-year marriage, 10-year relationship, 2-weeks old infatuation or 1-night stand – the man should bequeath a pair of Louboutins to the woman before anything kissy-kissy happens. Just to show that he respects her as an equal, and think of her highly even though all he wants is a quickie.

I’m pretty sure that if my wonderfully brilliant idea is followed, you’d see less women having low self-worths or feeling empty after a supposed “love” making session. I’m sure that the guys who do stick around to give Louboutins are the ones with enough mettle to stay for the long run.

But of course, as time goes by, the Louboutins would have to be upgraded to something which costs more, just as men get sanitized to the concept of it… So my suggested five-step upgrade:

1. Louboutins
2. Birkin bag
3. Car
4. House
5. Engagement ring

Been listening to this song on repeat on the iPhone at work –

“Well all I really wanna do is love you
A kind much closer than friends use”

I’ve yet to find the casa nova / live version though, which was what SYTYCD used.

Life trudges on… Work’s been okay, the restless feeling’s gone for the moment, although I doubt it won’t sneak in again.

Love life is a nil, this is probably the longest stretch I’ve been single, July marks its 1 year.

My friends are great, both old and new.

The urge to write has escaped me. Writing requires a pouring out of emotions, and I guess I’ve gotten used to clamping them down.

I hope me and Syd really go for dance next week…

Frustrated with people who doesn’t find the time/effort to connect. This shit isn’t fucking one way.

February 2010
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